Tuesday, November 1, 2011

An Explaination

So Maybe I should explain why I think of my life before the robbery as an Ivory Tower.

Wikipedia explains an ivory tower as "A world or atmosphere where intellectuals engage in pursuits that are disconnected from the practical concerns of everyday life". In modern times however it has come to signify something safe and secure, a life protected from the harsh realities that exist within the world.

I grew up in what is now called a nuclear home. My mother and father are childhood sweethearts, first meeting and starting to date when only in middle school. Apparently many people thought their marriage wouldn't last when they decided to tie the knot at only 19 years old, but here it is over 32 years later and they're still happily married. Despite not having a lot of money growing up, my parents always made sure my brother and I had everything we needed, and more than enough love. My mom was able to stay home with us until we went off to school, and then stayed nearby- volunteering and working in the schools for years. They were there for me when I got in trouble, and there to celebrate my accomplishments.
Ive known very few heartaches over the years, Love lost as all young women experience, the sad ending of some friendships when the time for them was past, and most significantly the loss of my YiaYia who I was dearly close to and the loss of 32 very dear people, two of whom were friends in the shootings that occurred on my beloved Virginia Tech campus in April of 2007. But this tragedy still did not hit me as harshly as some I know. I was removed from it by a 4+ hour drive.
My education has come easily to me, and my job has provided the ability for me to live a comfortable lifestyle, with a little occasional help from my parents. I have never had to live with the uncertainty of not having work, not being able to pay rent or being able to buy groceries.

I guess it just boils down to the fact that I was naive before the robbery, that I had experienced so much positive in my life that being slammed back to reality hit me harder than I ever could have imagined. Before May 10th 2011 I was just another normal girl, who was always smiling and laughing, incredibly optimistic and ready for the next adventure. Id say i've come to realize life in its reality now, as harsh as it is. Im trying to still be the happy, cheerful person i've always been, and most days I succeed, but i'm more pessimistic and definitely less trusting these days. I won't even get out of my car if there is anyone walking past unless theres a crowd of people nearby. Constantly checking over your shoulder is an interesting change in life and routine to get used to.

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